KevDawg: Peer Mediator or Shit Stirrer?? YOU DECIDE!

Well, as we all know conflicts are a big part of reality Television and a lot of people love to create drama or are sucked into drama and have to solve problems and conflicts. But off camera we all have to handle conflicts which ever way necessary.

CONFLICTS

Myself, if a conflict arises and it is something people around me feel strongly about, like the typical topics (abortion, religion, politics, homosexuality and/or if cheerleading is a sport ha) then I will definitely debate with them, just to have them see the other side of the coin because most of those people who feel so strongly have not been exposed to both sides and are ignorant to different lifestyles most of the time.
So when it comes to conflicts I most definitely pick and choose my battles. This is because I am not going to make someone change their mind, but in the same breath, it just makes life a little more interesting when someone who is so against something like homosexuality, for example, sees that not every gay man is feminine and there are gay men who play football and do "manly" things. So how I handle conflicts regarding opinions is to debate with the other person if deemed necessary.
I am told that I can diffuse awkward situations and calm the room down very well, but there are times when I snap and when I do, all hell breaks loose. If someone hits one of my "fine points" or pushes my buttons, I go wild and tell them off, which sometimes gets me in trouble.
My approach to diffusing conflicts is to see how the person is acting and how strongly they feel about the conflict at hand. From there I decide if it is worth going on and explaingin myself more and also to decide if I need to be more aggresive and passive. I feel that my approach to handling conflicts is very useful and effective because people tend to listen to a person who knows how and when to stay calm or pushy (which I can be at times). This is my tactic and it works wonders to drunken as well as stone cold sober people. haha.

BIGGEST PROBLEM I AM FACING

Changing subjects... okayyyy... I'm going to start off saying that I have many problem that I face from day to day. I have one particular problem I face everyday and it erks me to even say it on this website because many people do not know this about me. I am not going to directly say it, but through my previous and future blogs as well as my videos, I bet you'll be able to figure it out. ;) Many of my college classmates and friends know, but I have been dealing with this problem since I was about 12. I haven't direclty told people and even the people I have told I feel awkars talkign about it to. Who wants to hear about my issues and problems, when they have problems themselves that their lives give them. I feel that opening up to people makes me more vulnerable to criticism and scrutiny. This is why I feel that the Real World will help me with this problem. I cannot make decisions for myself so I end up just being pushed into making a decision and I hope that this experience would help in doing so... pushing me to feel comfortable in my own skin. The next blog, if i make it to round 5 AHH!!! will DEFINITELY explain my situation and my hardest problem I face becasue it goes along with the question, "If you were cast on the RW, what would your family be surprised to learn about you?" so make guesses and deliberate about what it could be!

CHILDHOOD

My childhood was one that many people say "Ph, im so sorry to hear that." or "That sucks!", but I do not feel that way. I did not know anything else to compare it to. Like I have explained in previous blogs about my parents, I have never met my father so that makes people say, "oh, I'm sorry to hear that." My biological father left when I was born. I know his name and I know where he lives (in the general region), but have never tried to locate and pin point him. When I was 3, my mom got married for the first time to a man who adopted me through marriage. I then took his last name since he was my "father". I always knew him to be my dad. I thought he was my real father until when I was 6 my cousins told me that he wasn;t my real dad. This was confusing because I thought it was my blood. And I know that it sounds weird that a 6 year old would feel this way, but it was awkward for me to see him in the same light. A few months after finding out that my adopted dad was nto my real father, he divorced my mother becasue he was cheating on her and wanted to marry this lady that he was cheating on my mom with. After the divorce, I saw him on weekends for about a month and he told my mom that he did not want to see me anymore, which is the honest truth. So, I havewnt seen him since I was 6 which is 15 years ago. That has had a big effect on my life because it set a mood and put a damper on my experience with fathers.
But on a more positive note, my childhood was not all depressing. Not for one second did I ever think, "Why me?" I did not know any better and my family has always been the people who have been closest to me. My cousins are like my brothers and sisters. My aunts and uncles and grandparents have always been nothing but amazing in my life. I cannot see myself without my family. My mother is the best person in the whole entire world. I have more os a sister-brother relationsship with my mom than an acutal mother-son relationship. She is definitely the nig sister though. She keeps me in check and has always been a positive role model for me. Once again, I do not know what I would have been like or what I would have grown up to be if it wasn't for her. So, oerall, I can say that my life has been more ups than downs, but that the downs had made the ups more enjoyable and treasureable.

FAMILY AFFECTED BY EVENT

A few years ago, my grandfather passed away. Even though my family had been very tight and close before these deaths, this brought my family closer to each other becasue this was the first time someone had passed away in my life that had an impact on me in general. It is amazing how in tragedy and emergencies, that is when people really show their true personalities and what type of person they are. Every single person in my family got done what they had to get sone, make the arrangements and everything almost fell into place. My family changed in the fact that all of us got a taste of the "you never know when your last day is going to be" and it made us all think and appreciate life to the fullest at that point. I can honestly say that has had the largest impact on my family in a whole. I know that everyone has had their deaths, but for my family, it brought us more together and stronger since then.

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